He was the boy I was studying rocks with. So, no, anonymous commenter, that incident probably wasn't all that innocent... I just didn't know it at the time. You see, I had to get past my social climbing aspirations - first by going out with Joe, then by spending 71 emails rehashing a quick misplaced peck during a close dance session with Mike (another one of Solon Middle School's finest). Note: he literally wrote me an email the next day that said "sorry..." I have the emails, but they're too humiliating to share - even here.
So once I woke up and realized that I didn't want to be the discarded Halloween candy on the arm of one of the really cool kids, I looked at my limestone loving pal Mark and fell in love with that eye-freckle.
Apparently he wasn't so sure about me...
So that movie that we went to? It was called Boys and Girls. Maybe you've heard of it. Most likely you haven't. Here's the trailer:
And here's how, in some way, Mark and I really related to this movie (despite the fact that Jason Biggs was in it and I don't think anyone should relate to any of his flicks.)
If you didn't have the time to fully witness my pushiness into trying to get this poor kid to admit he liked me, here's what you need to know: I somehow compared our relationship to one of individuals old enough to drive, vote and drink. I linked summer camp in Wisconsin to a trip to Italy and continually beat the topic to death until he left for camp 3 days later.
The rest of our relationship (or lack thereof) was just as exhausting as what you've just experienced, so I'll just give you the highlights:
June 20th: "Okay, I just spent my first whole day not talking to Mark. Its killing me. 1 day down, 29 more to go."
July 10th: "And what if he does like me, where do I go from there? I can't keep holding on to nothing, but what if I have something to hold onto, am I going to drown anyway?"
July 18th: "He intentionally hurt me, he knew he didn't like, but yet he didn't have the fucking balls to tell me. I don't need to take his shit anymore. He had me and now he's lost me. In a few weeks he will realize how big of an idiot he is to have given me up without a fight. He will realize that he was lucky to have me for so long and he will come crawling back like some pathetic loser, and I will have moved on. Then I can tell him, 'I liked you for five months, and you messed with my head and left me hanging. Then you just started acting like I was gross and that you were much too cool to be talking to the likes of me. So I forgot about your pathetic kindergarten ass and moved on... your loss.' Now here's the really pathetic part: I know I'm not over him and I know that the moment he stops being an ass, I'll like him again. But I don't want to so unless he does some major ass-kissing, I'm not going to let myself like him again."
August 1st: "Mark has a girlfriend. He met her at camp and they started going out 2 weeks into it. Her name is Ali and she lives in Chicago. So I'm a little upset."
August 13th: "Then about an hour into the party Mark and I started talking and joking with each other like we used to. And we would joke-fight and push each other around. So he kept coming up behind me and whispering 'bitch' in my ear and I called him 'loser.' I was so happy because it was just like before!"
August 30th: "I need to stop setting my expectations so high because I'm going to keep being let down. Mark's not going to like me and sweep me off my feet anytime soon... I know that, so why can't I stop pretending it's going to happen? Friday night he's not going to take me on a walk and while we are talking he's not going to stop me, wrap his arms around me and kiss me... but why can't I stop hoping he will? Life is far too precious to be living a lie - so why can't I stop?"
September 2nd: "I'm never going to get over Mark unless there is a 'get-over-point.' There hasn't been one yet and I don't know when it's gonna be. It hurts to wait, but I can't help it. Too late, I'm attached."
September 12th: "Well, Mark and Hannah are going out. Monday, I was going to ask out Mark but I wanted to check with Hannah to make sure it was okay with here before I did. She told me she didn't want me to ask him out and I told her that if she wasn't going to ask him out, I was. So last night she told him she liked him and today he asked her out. She called me today and I told her to say yes. I didn't want to do to her what she did to me. If I ever had a chance with him, she took it away."
Oh, Kelsey. You never had a chance.
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